Odd and disturbing:
I keep dreaming of the old house we lived in, but instead of an apartment, I now dream it is an unfinished four-storey house standing by the sea.. and... it's got a department store inside. I also keep dreaming of a mall that is familiar and yet I know did not exist. It may be the same structure.
Odd and frustrating:
I can't find my flow at work. Work keeps piling up and I am such a genius in ignoring it. I can't concentrate and I find myself trying to think of other things to occupy my mind with. Grieving's fine, but spacing out is potentially dangerous to my career.
Odd and irritating:
Ella acting prissy all the time now. I know she's dealing with the same things I am. I'm giving her allowances for her attitude because she's younger. But --- as a sister who loves her --- I still can say she can be a real b**ch sometimes. I'm running out of patience, treading on unruly waters, and really, really near insane. Thing is, I'm not Mummy and Daddy -- and there were two of them to handle her, for crying out loud.
Odd and amusing and useful:
Norman giving me advice on how to flirt with guys... no kidding. I did solicit it, for that matter. BUT --- his replies were far out funny and, get this, actually makes sense (well, that's Norman right?). He sounded like a writer for Cosmo. (Peace, Chi!) I quote:
"Maybe the direct approach isn't best. Smile warmly and look into his eyes when he holds your hand, let your touches linger, etc... don't blush or giggle! I recommend flattery. Tell him he's cute."
I was torn between rolling on the floor laughing or thinking in amazement : Since when did he become the love guru?
Seriously though, he makes sh*tload of sense. When I called myself baduy, he replied:
"It's not baduy. We all want someone to love us. If we're afraid to make it happen, it's not going to. Granted, it's a risk, but if you do it right, the worst that could happen is he'll pretend to be obtuse. Don't make it easy for him! The absolutely crucial thing is to appear, and be, confident."
And since he is aware of my hopelessly defective gaydar, complete in the knowledge that I fell for him before he came out as well, he even checked: "He doesn't have player tendencies does he? It's surprising how many guys are heartbreakers when given the chance. More importantly, he's straight, right???"
Don't tell me, I know I'm hopeless. When my gay best friend needs to tell me how to snag guys, I better reconsider entering the convent na lang. Thanks anyway, Chi. I know you're trying your best to be supportive. I promise I'll be there on your wedding day. Most probably, still single.
Odd and weird:
Why are you being nice to me? Be careful. Or better yet, I better be careful.