Futile


I spent half of my dream last night searching for a boy who does not want to be found.

I'm getting tired of keeping too many things in my heart and none of it becoming a reality. My uncle came as close to telling me that as long as I am not slim, the average guy will have a hard time finding me. It is reality in men's brains, he says. They are looking for physical perfection as a sign of other perfections. I think, his point was that, I should reserve my heart for above average men. Sounds logical to me. But the problem is that: the one I like is a very average boy.

So naturally, it's another futile effort.

And I'm tired of futility. Especially if I'm just another girl to him. Sucks, but I have to start sucking on some reality now.

Go hit your head somewhere hard, Liv and wake up to the truth that --- you're not the perfect one for him.

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