Swazzled

Absolutely have no idea what swazzled means. It's right up there with swasquatch and fizzladdled, and joot and weeezums.

But somehow, that's the most accurate word I could use to describe how I'm feeling right now. I am totally swazzled. As proof of it, I have been making my happy sounds all day (happy sounds are something you do when you are in a good mood and you just make weird noises without thinking). It's that odd "Wee-wooo, wee-wooo!" sound that just comes out of me when I'm feeling okay. I sound like a zippy, frolicsome fire truck with a little engine that could.

In keeping up with the Holy Friday tradition, I should be in mourning-mode right now, commemorating Christ and His death. But dearest Lord, I am only rarely ever happy nowadays and I pray you would not damn me and my progeny decades after this day just because I felt like singing "Weee-wooo!"

While Daddy attended the Pabasa in one of his Catholic groups, my sister, my cousin and I went to our Uncle's house to play with Gayb. Any day I see Gayb is a good day. He looks so much like me when I was younger. Considering that he's a boy, I'm not so sure if that speaks well of me, but anyway, he is the most adorable thing since stuffed toys.



He's quickly taking after me, asking if we brought him books the moment he saw us. :) After playing for a while, I saw a couple of DVDs I'd like to watch and so I borrowed Gayb's portable DVD viewer. Shux, astig, noh? My 2-year old cousin has his own DVD player! And me, a grown-up person with an actual job (albeit one that pays too low) could only loll my tongue in envy.

Even when I was a kid and Daddy was still earning his millions, he never ever bought me anything more expensive than a 12-in-1 brick game. He said he was teaching me the value of appropriateness. Of course now, as I look back, I see that my Daddy wasn't really awed by techie gadgets in the first place and wouldn't understand its appeal to kids. For goodness sake, he did not buy a computer until I was sixteen years old! And the way he looks at his Nokia 3315 cellphone as if its alien technology assures me that he's a bit of a technophobe as well.

But I digress. I was just telling you how fabulous the portable viewer was. And how I watched 2 movies this afternoon with the DVD resting on my tummy, earphones on my ears and popcorn to munch. It doesn't sound comfortable now that i write about it, but I certainly was content that time.

I watched The Prophecy 5: The Forsaken and Everything is Illuminated. Hmmm... do you feel a Geek's Guider coming up? :) Hehe, you betcha. Who am I to disappoint you?

The Prophecy 5: The Forsaken

I wasn't expecting anything amazing when I decided to watch this movie. I just wanted to see something that will pass the time, y'know? It's better not to have high expectations so you won't be sorely disappointed in the end. I suppose that's why I ended up enjoying this film.

Briefly, it covers the story of the existence of a book called the Lexicon, which writes itself (kewl huh?). But it doesn't write just about anything; it's supposedly the Words of God itself that the pages reveal. In the next few days, the Lexicon is about to disclose the name of the Anti-Christ who we are told was already born. The priest who was guarding the book died of a heart attack right after realizing the enormity of what is about to be revealed to the world. Guardianship was then passed on to Allison (played by Kari Wuhrer), an American taking up her PhDs in Theology in Bucharest.

Unwittingly, Allison and a hit man named Dylan (competently portrayed by Jason Scott Lee) were caught in a War between the legions of God's unloyal angels and the Devil himself. The Angels want the book so they could locate the Anti-Christ and kill him (yes, it's a he) so as to prevent the coming of the Armageddon as it is depicted in The Book of Revelations. (oooh, trivia: Armageddon and Revelation means the same in Greek) The Devil on the other hand, wants to protect the book so that Armageddon does come and he will reap the corrupted souls which God's Righteous Hand has denied.

Now, the question is, why would the angels want to prevent Armageddon? We go back to the classic reasoning of angelic jealousy. If the End of the World ensues, God will reap the souls of the worthy and damn those who proved false to him. The humanity who will survive Armageddon will then become the restorers of humanity, God's most beloved. And angels, who were ever on God's side will be relegated as servants, second-class citizens of the heavens once more. The angels want people to remain sinful, forever degrading themselves in the eyes of God.
It bothers me a bit that angels are presented a bit shabbily ere. I suppose I am not an expert on the hierarchy of the heavens, but I have always believed angels to be messengers and benevolent spirits. In this movie, they are just as downright dirty and shameful as humans are, except that they act in a self-righteous manner thus rendering them more dangerous. They were also described as sensing humans only by taste and smell, as their sight isn't as strong and we look like monkeys to them. The thrones were described as low-class thugs, the cherubs were said to be malofficious, while the seraphs are the real deal... they are either righteous or self-righteous. Unfortunately, the seraph leading the fallen angels here (Stark) was of the latter.

Another fact that gets to me is that Satan plays a sympathetic role here, that you are almost rooting for him. I think the movie wanted you to root for him. One can't help it though because the angels were such mean, cruel creatures in the story, while Lucifer plays cool-as-you-please and he is endlessly easy on the eyes as well (portrayed by John Light). He even actually helps Allison here. Oh Good Lord, I sure hope I haven't sinned by liking his portrayal for a tiny fractal of the movie. The most believable line he ever uttered in the movie was, "The politics of angels are not so different from the politics of men" and the other one was "The interests of heaven and hell are not as far apart as you would have it believed."

I was just wondering though, when all of the action and suspense was happening, was God watching chaos play out up there wherever He is? What would he do about this renegade angels? Would He do anything at all? Reminds you that God is unreadable as He is infallible. sigh.

I didn't want to tell you how the movie ended. Except that you probably knew the angels wouldn't be getting the book, and instead (surprise!) the last page which revealed the Anti-Christ's name as Mykael Paun found its way to the hands of young Mykael himself. Hehe, sorry. But I'm sure you wouldn't be rushing out to the video to rent the movie anyway, and I won't really advice you, unless you're bored to your wit's end.

Oh wait! Another interesting fact also turns up revealing that Allison is not a mere human being. She is a nephilim -- half-angel and half-human. Meaning, she has the resilience of an angel (she will not die easily unless her heart was ripped out or a bullet goes through her third eye), as well as the resourcefulness of a human being. I only mention it because this nifty little thing fits really well with a story brewing inside my head and it really peaked my interest.

All in all the movie wasn't half as bad. There were references to scenes in the previous movie that I didn't get because I did not watch Prophecy 4: The Uprising. But I got over it and I thoroughly lost myself in the plot. Coming back, I am actually wired to write because my imagination's engine was triggered. Maybe that's why I'm happy today.

Because I feel like writing.


Everything is Illuminated

Pretty nifty-looking Elijah Wood on the cover, humongous glasses and all. Weird looking though. As if he's odd Peter Parker pre-Spiderman era. Turns out the movie was just as weird. Funny, but really kind of strange.

The movie's gist is that Jonathan Foer (Wood) goes back to Ukraine to trace the woman who helped his grandfather escape the Nazi-reign. All he actually had was a grasshopper frozen in amber and a photo of his grandfather with the mysterious woman. He meets Alex Perchov who became his tour guide/translator in his "rigid search". The movie is actually narrated by Perchov and his odd mix of English and Ukrainian provided most of the hilarious parts of the movie.

I admit, I was a bit bored from watching this. I just finished it because a story was started in my head and I wanted to see it through. So I guess, I could tell you that Jonathan discovered that his grandfather was actually married to the woman in the picture whose name was Augustina. And the whole search became a soul-searching journey, Jew-style.

I know I should feel ashamed. This movie is a bundle of good intentions. The book wanted to illustrate the irony, sobriety and oddness of the Holocaust. Meanwhile, this movie wanted to put at peace the memories of one of the most hideous terrors of the past. And Alex Perchov is such a colorful character, as well as his deranged grandfather, but I don't get it. Maybe, I should have concentrated better. But you see, I wasn't looking for a thinking movie this afternoon. So a lot of the good points they wanted to bring across probably just sailed right past me. I suppose I would have to watch it again someday to really understand it.

The most interesting aspect of the story for me was that Jonathan was a kind of "Collector." He collects things connected to memories. He Ziplocks stuff whichhe believes are significant to him. A peeled potato, a rock, soil, underwear... anything.

When pressed why he does this, he just simply answers, "Because I'm afraid that I'll forget."

I wonder, if he were a real person, would collecting things like that really help remember? Wouldn't it dampen things a bit when instead of feeling your emotions, you're busy searching for a memento?

Interesting.

And I guess, I kept at the movie because I like Elijah Wood. I mean, c'mon, I heart this kid ever since he was in that Mel Gibson movie signing "You are my sunshine, my only sunshine..." Was that Forever Young? I forgot. I also watched him in Flipper, The War, The Good Son, LOTR, of course... you catch my drift. I don't think I'll ever be sure, but I must be discreetly in love with this guy and his creepy big blue eyes. In fact, so discreet that I am irritated by him most of the time but I keep watching his movies. And liking it. Even if they are as boring as this one.

Well, that's it then. This is a long entry. Whew! Where'd time go? It's 10:30 p.m. and I haven't had dinner yet. I actually forgot to eat dinner... How addictive can blogging get, huh? :)

Til tomorrow then.